Tools

*This section is particular to Ayal’s work with clients.

A common and understandable request among clients and their loved ones is to develop psychological “tools” as a primary goal of care. The principles and purposes of various therapeutic tools can sometimes be straightforward, and others abstract, or vague - especially to kids. Concerned parents often begin a conversation about counseling for their child noting, “My kid is struggling and needs tools.” Tools such as social skills, appropriate expression of strong feelings and conflict resolution, to name a few of the big ones.

The problem with psychological tools is that they are often too cerebral and out of reach to a flustered child - or adult! Moreover, an intellectual approach to psychological tools can feel way too much like school, or work.

For this reason, our office is filled with literal, physical tools; not just hammers and screwdrivers, but a whole array of hand and power tools for people to learn and play with. Most of us are familiar with the adage “When all you have is a hammer, every problem looks like a nail.” What if we could utilize ten or twenty different tools for a given problem? What if we could learn how to design our own tools and forge, fabricate, or construct them? How much more nuance and ingenuity could we bring to our lives and relationships?

I teach people how to use and create a variety of tools so they can generalize these skills to everyday life. With gentleness and an artist’s sensibility, I offer a helping hand toward comprehending the idea that perhaps, how we do anything is how we do everything**. 

*Attributed to author Martha Beck.